Inquiry - Romance (Not a vent post, promise)

[kriadydragon]

So I think most know how I feel about pairings. I've never been a fan of romance, can't stand the whining, angsty complications with some romance, character A worrying if character B really loves them all while they're running for their lives or the world's about to end, and cringe whenever a show or book introduces a "potential love interest." Oh, and mustn't forget my distaste in sex scenes.

The thing is, though, I'm not so opposed to romance as to not have it at all when it comes to my own stories. The other thing is, I tend to be subtle about the romance - in that it's not front and center, yet neither is it entirely not there at all. The best way I can sum it up is to say I "leave it open"; in that you can see it as friendship that might one day become more, friendship that is becoming more, or - well - very subtle romance ;)

The recent story I'm attempting to plot (original fic, not fanfic) got me thinking about how I handle romance and romance in general. When is it too much? Too little? Cringe worthy or just right? That kind of stuff. I want to hear other's opinions on romance. For example, is a story/show just as good if no romance is involved? Can friendships be just as powerful? Etc. Anything you have to say on the matter, please say it. The story I'm plotting isn't a romance, but there's a guy, a girl, the potential for feelings but hopefully not to the extent that it dominates most of the plot. But plots can be sneaky that way ;)

Comments

[karri-kln1671.livejournal.com]

I've written a romance ficlet and had fun doing it, but I still think friendships are more powerful than romance. However, a shipper would probably have a different opinion on that. ;)

My position on romance is, erm, a conundrum, I guess. Sometimes I adore it, sometimes I can't stand it, and I'm not nearly eloquent enough to explain what makes the difference in an comprehensible way. A lot of it has to do with sensibility. Does the pairing make sense? Is it workable within the setting it takes place? Does it distract from the story or enhance it?

Generally speaking, if the romantic relationship isn't going to hinder the working relationship of the characters, then I tend to enjoy it as a secondary storyline. If the romantic relationship is going to be problematic professionally or culturally then it tends to annoy me. However, again, shippers tend to love that whole against all odds/breaking the rules sorta romances.

Also, generally speaking, if the romance is written into the universe from the get-go, it doesn't bother me, but when its inserted later on to what has previously been a platonic or UST-only universe, then its annoying. I think that's because when its inserted later, it tends to result in the character acting out of character.

If there's a male/female partnership that's non-professional, such as two adventurers/explorers/mercenaries, something like that, the logical conclusion for me tends to be a slowly developing romantic involvement, and I usually enjoy it, assuming its been set up from the start of the novel/movie/story.

Still, even when I enjoy the romance in a story, its the deep friendships that I like best, whether there's a romantic edge to it or familial/platonic friendship.

There's an exception to every rule, of course, but there ya go. Those are my thought as well as I can express than this evening.

[sholio]

I don't think there is a right or wrong, just what's best for the story and what sort of relationships you want to explore. Generally speaking, I usually find platonic emotions resonate with me more strongly than sexual ones, but that's not always true. You can also have couples sans romance; the last SF novel I read, Elizabeth Bear's "Undertow", started out with most of the main characters either married or paired off, but it was not a romance at all -- just an adventure SF novel in which most of the characters weren't single.

Well, and that brings up another consideration -- narrative believability. Certain kinds of characters are much more likely than others to have either current or past romance in their lives. In many fantasy or non-Earth settings, a character's society will require them to be married young, so you'd need a really good reason for anyone past their culture's age of marriage to still be single, unless they're widowed. A 70-year-old, globe-trotting adventurer who's still a virgin would be such an oddity that I'd need some kind of reason for it in the story, whereas a 20-year-old could easily just have not had the experience yet. The older and more worldly a character is, the less likely it is that they don't have a lover or spouse in their past -- not that one couldn't, but depending on their society, personality and circumstances, it becomes much less likely. Even Emily Dickenson had boyfriends! (And possibly girlfriends as well.)

On the other hand, I certainly don't think a story is missing anything if it doesn't center around two characters falling in love. There are many other kinds of human relationships to explore. No matter what kind of story you write, there is surely someone, somewhere, who will find it just their thing.

[novembersga.livejournal.com]

Definitely depends on how one defines 'Romance' I'm not as eloquent as some in getting my point across, but I'll try.

I'm not a shipper and I'll admit that right up front. I prefer friendships that 'may' include deep respect and an unusual closeness.

That being said, I've read and enjoyed stories that include relationships. If it is done well it's usually not an issue.

I don't like the relationship to be front and center nor the main story-line. If it is something that is occurring with the character, but does not detract from the story itself then it usually doesn't bother me.

Romance in my opinion does not mean, in-and-of-itself, 'sex' I don't have to have it all spelled out for me to know what's going on. If the characters are written realistically, there's no need. (It's a detractor in most cases) i.e. if the characters are married, then it's logical to assume they're physically involved.

I have an easier time accepting a character's romantic involvement if it's part of the story right from the beginning. It's so hard to come in later and introduce a character or stick one character with another without it looking contrived or 'mary-sue-ish' If you've got a really long story, you may be able to steadily build up to a relationship, or hint at the possibility of one if done right.

The next problem would be insuring that the characters 'work' together. There are characters, that because of their personality type, method of interaction, or their 'voice' can strike me as lending to specific relationship modes with the main character. (professional, sisterly/matronly (without actually being related), or potential romantic involvement. There are even those you can see as being attracted to one another for a time but don't seem the type to be permanent.

I don't like reading about love/hate relationships. (manipulating, backstabbing, cheating, fighting or angsting over staying/leaving.

Realistically, relationships don't involve perfect people. Everyone has faults. Those in love accept those faults and compensate. Faults should not be magnified or used as points of contention. A couple should stand together and lean on each other in times of need. Face the world and it's trials together. Couples that constantly fight, love each other this week and hate each other the next, are complete turn-offs. (I know this is 'my' opinion and that there are those that read a story specifically to see the love/hate and which way it will fall...it's just not for me.)

I tend to not read romance in fan-fiction because it is often so OOC or I just can't see the specific pairings happening. I don't usually read it in original fiction either because most of the time there are explicit scenes.

As I said before though, if done well, a 'relationship' between characters can be an uplifting read.

[bratfarrar]

Hm. Tricky question. My initial reaction is that as long as you stay away (far far away) from describing how the characters are feeling (butterflies in stomach, the other person having eyes like deep pools, etc.), you're probably okay. But that's overly simplistic and probably not very helpful.


...yeah, I got nothing.

kriadydragon fic fan

[(Anonymous)]

I am not opposed to romance as long as it is realistic, pertinent, and smart...not too sappy, but honest expression of emotions/feelings are nice. I don't mind it being front and center, as long as I know that's what I'm going to be reading...but if the plot has another main focus, the romance should not attempt to intrude or overshadow the main storyline. It can compliment the main storyline and bring a richness to the story without being distracting. It also needs to be written in a way that is believable...not forcing a pairing for the sake of having one. I think it takes a good writer to accomplish all of that. Trust your instincts. You have good ones. - Diane

[flingslass.livejournal.com]

I like the romance to be a secondary or in the background to a story and yes I know I haven't actually written anything yet but I know what I'd be comfortable trying. If reading a SF or Fantasy (Swords and Sorcery) then there may be a secondary story involving a romance but it's not a major part. I love a story with adventure, camaraderie and friendship.
(Note I'm trying to improve my writing by answering your question. It has given me something to think about.)