Conundrum Time!

[kriadydragon]

Okay, so you run across something you feel to be slightly offensive in someone's journal - someone you know and who is on your f'list. Not personally offensive, but possibly offensive to another group, or nation, or religion, or what have you.

Do you say something?

ETA: When I say offensive I don't mean that they're being deliberately offensive. That is, they're not trying to be mean or insulting. They're just kidding around, is all. Basically it's your classic foot-in-mouth situation but they don't seem to realize it.

Comments

[black-raven135.livejournal.com]

You said she is part of your flist, but I know sometimes there are some closer ties in a flist than others........
Therefore, you an address it in her journal where the comment was made, or
if not suitable, then how about a PM??
If it bothered me, I would do so.........
BTW kidding around can be just as hurtful as direct potshots.

[nefhiriel.livejournal.com]

"Basically it's your classic foot-in-mouth situation but they don't seem to realize it."

I suppose it would depend a lot on how close you are to the friend/how well you think it would be received. And, yeah, I agree with the above comments about PMing over leaving a comment others could see...

All in all, I think I'd really want a friend to correct me over a foot-in-mouth like that, embarrassing though it'd be to have something like that pointed out. :3

[sholio]

Oh, I struggle so hard with that. I haven't come across something like that very often, but on the occasions when it has happened, I have sometimes gone ahead and said something, and sometimes just quietly let it go. Sometimes I've had it turn out kind of badly (including one person who unfriended me), but usually the person's been really nice about it and receptive to my comment. It does seem to turn out the best if you're very polite about it and make sure that you let them know you know it was unintentional ...

Personally, like nefhiriel said, I want people to feel like they can speak up to me if I say something offensive, and I hope I would react well if someone ever did.

[mmneely932.livejournal.com]

Nope, leave it be. Just because you find it offensive and others might, doesn't mean it's offensive to everyone. It's his/her journal, he/she may have meant it, if you are REALLY offended, drop the friend otherwise respect his/her right to feel differently than you. I despise it when someone tries to tell me how I SHOULD feel about something or someone. If I dislike people with red hair that's my right, you can't force me to like them and the more you try to force me to the more I'll dig my heels in and stick to my feelings.

[bratfarrar]

I'd say yes, PM the person. I had someone do that to me a couple months about a story I'd written, raising an issue I'd never even considered. An eight-word disclaimer later, no feelings were hurt and everyone went home happy, but that might not have been true if she hadn't said something.

Unless you know the person is touchy about that kind of thing, in which case I'd say let sleeping dogs lie.