Been wanting to say this for a while, now

[kriadydragon]

Like the title says. This is something I've kept wanting to say in comment responses and memes but, well, didn't know how to put it exactly. I think I have it figure out, though. Don't worry, it is neither shocking nor disturbing. Just a little insight into my warped... er, uh... perfectly sane mind. Sane, I swear.

I'm a very "if that's the way it is, then that's the way it should/needs/ is supposed to be" kind of person. It's the reason why things upset me, annoy me, or boggle me so dang easily (mostly boggle, I think). When I first got into fanfcition, I honestly did not get why anyone would write a story based on a beloved show and not stick with what that show was doing. I didn't understand the appeal of AUs, slash, and romance that wasn't on the show (okay, romance I did kind of get so I wasn't quite as surprised by it.) I didn't get taking characters out of their worlds and sticking them in something entirely different. For example, taking the characters of a crime drama and sticking them in a fantasy. Only the Stargate universe makes me comfortable with AUs since the actual show deals with them often, but even then I tend to have a hard time writing them, especially the further they move away from canon.

It's the reason I've never been really happy with my CSI:NY fics. I've enjoyed writing them, liked how they turned out, but always felt they weren't close enough to canon. Yes, I know, no fanfic can be one-hundred percent canon, but it took me a while to finally accept that. For a while, some stories I even ended up hating when something was done on the show that contradicted what I did in the story. Yes, I'm that anal. Which is why I love the SGA fandom so much as it allows for a lot more plot possibilities.

It's the reason I get so uptight about reviewers praising blatantly skewed or off characterization.

It also makes me a very rigid follower of instructions, especially when cooking, and why I get mad when someone tells me to do things differently (although that's also in part because I hate being told what to do, especially when it's something I already know how to do.)

I don't always listen to or give into this little trait, but it is prevailant.

So, there you have it, the reason behind my short frustration fuse.

And as you can tell from this, I'm also the kind of person who always feels the need to explain myself, even when I don't need to.  *shrugs*

Comments

[reen212000.livejournal.com]

And ya betta not change!

[kriadydragon.livejournal.com]

Heeeeeee!;)

[a-pilgrim-soul.livejournal.com]

This doesn't make you weird. We all have our little quirks and foibles it's what makes us who we are - and I like you just as you are.

I too have a deep dislike for AU's, if they are written for a sci-fi show, and are conceivable within the constraints of that show, then they can often be great but I have a hatred for all the silly AU's which have no resemblance to the original show.

It's just stealing the physical appearance and general traits of the characters and sticking them in an original work. I just shake my head when I see things like "Pirate AU" or somewhat to my amazement a "library AU" :S

Luckily for me I don't read much fanfic these days because I just find myself getting stressed out over it.

And I'm also someone who likes to do things in a certain way and gets very upset if someone gets in the way and "spoils" things. I need to have control over certain things in life - and the trouble is you can't control other people and they have a tendency to get in the way.

Going back to CSI:NY I would dearly love to write a fic for this show but I'm struggling enough with SGA fic right now. I have a vague idea of a Danny & Hawkes friendship fic but time will tell if it ever comes to anything, I want to write a good old fashioned whodunnit which will take some time to sort out. My favorite fics are always those ones that could work as an episode.

[kriadydragon.livejournal.com]

Luckily for me I don't read much fanfic these days because I just find myself getting stressed out over it.

I've been getting that way myself, lately, which is why I'm trying to stick like glue only to those authors I know and trust.

And I'm also someone who likes to do things in a certain way and gets very upset if someone gets in the way and "spoils" things. I need to have control over certain things in life - and the trouble is you can't control other people and they have a tendency to get in the way.

Very, unnervingly true. It's why (should my original fics become popular) that I'm leaning heavily toward not opening them up for people to write fanfic. As much as I enjoy reading and writing fanfic, I doubt I'd be able to handle some writer butchering my characters the way I've seen them butcher others. I know it sounds harsh, but I've come across stories that practically rip a character to shreds just to reform them into something else, and I doubt it would be good for my blood pressure seeing it happen to a character that's my own.

I miss writing CSI:NY fic but the muses don't have much of an interest in that fandom these days, though I am trying to think up something.

[clarkangel.livejournal.com]

This makes you not only totally sane *and I share a few of your traits*, but a very interesting person. Don't change.

[kriadydragon.livejournal.com]

Thank ye.

[kontiki.livejournal.com]

..."This doesn't make you weird. We all have our little quirks and foibles it's what makes us who we are - and I like you just as you are."...

Thank You a_pilgrim_soul !!!

AMEN

...and no, you don't need to explain yourself!!

...having said that. it usually helps me feel better when I have gone through the onerous exercise of clarifying to myself, in writing, how I feel.

How you feel about anything is how you feel and should be honored. There is nothing wrong with how you feel.

...laughs at self...I first started reading fanfic in 1996. Star Trek Voyager fanfic.

Fanfic that didn't follow canon really *really* bugged me! And there was a lot of it!! The whole slash idea left me cold, big squick factor !! Then I'd run into stories that I thought really missed the canon boat and bunches of people are running around leaving comments about how the author really caught the essence of the characters and how the portrayal in the story was dead on...and all I can think is these people are way, way up in the night, and they have *missed* fundamental elements of characterization and their take on the story is sure not what I saw when I watched the show!!??!!

Then I saw my first flame wars over the differences in perceptions...very ugly...

(BTW, I have NEVER flamed anyone EVER. I am neither the thought police nor the canon police . I believe in the practice of SELF censorship, and the applied use of the delete key.)

I have a sneaking fondness for period literature. Dickens, Alcott, and the like, most of which would at least try and sneak in bits of tales that were intended to be of moral value. In one of the stories the young heroine is caught reading a racey french novel by her guardian who tells her it isn't suitable material for a young woman, he has her translate what she is reading to him, and she can't without using language that embarrases her to use. She eventually says "well, you read it!" His response is, You may safely read at 40 (years) what is bad for you at 20.

I have found this to be true for me over the years.
As I've gotten older I'm less vulnerable. It is easier for me to see the difference between a point of view that is bullshit from a point of view that is valid but foreign to how I think or what I consider normal.

Most of us don't have a trusted person to censor things for us, we have to trust our own internal censors when something isn't right for us and then move on. And I believe that our internal censor of what is right for us and not right for us needs to be honored. It is a form of self protection that is important.

On the fanfic front, I started seeing the different variations as different universes. Then I would imagine a big green RESET button that I would firmly push to restart/reboot my assumptions about what I was expecting to see in the story. Not kidding here, I really did deliberately do the mental imaging of the reset button. It really helped me let go and move on.

[kriadydragon.livejournal.com]

Most of us don't have a trusted person to censor things for us, we have to trust our own internal censors when something isn't right for us and then move on. And I believe that our internal censor of what is right for us and not right for us needs to be honored. It is a form of self protection that is important.

Nicely said.

On the fanfic front, I started seeing the different variations as different universes. Then I would imagine a big green RESET button that I would firmly push to restart/reboot my assumptions about what I was expecting to see in the story.

I do something similar. If a story's content troubles me, I just look at it as original fic that doesn't really relate to the show. What especially works is picking out things in the story that, to me, are totally opposite of the character or characters being used. I keep the actual show separated from the fandom unless it's a story that's as canon as it's going to get (even the small AUS that deal with what-ifs). The stories still bug me, but not as bad as they did, and have no affect on me when it comes to how I feel about the show.

[bratfarrar]

Oh yes, quite sane. After all, what is sanity except someone's perception of the world matching the reality of the world?

Also, I just realized that I feel similarly about out-and-out AUs, where the story is utterly divorced from the canon. Few people write these and manage to keep the characters the same, so a big part of me wants to say "why didn't you just write about your own characters?" There are exceptions, but not many.

Oddly enough, I think I enjoy semi-canonical AUs the most, like ltlj's Retrograge series. I'm attracted by the whole "this is how it might have gone" thing.

Actually, I think I have sort of the opposite tendency of what you describe. Rather than saying "this is how it is, this is how it should be", I tend to ask "is there some way to do it better?" Which translates into me rewriting procedure instructions at work, among other things.

[bratfarrar]

er, ltlj's Retrograde series, that is.

[kriadydragon.livejournal.com]

Oddly enough, I think I enjoy semi-canonical AUs the most, like ltlj's Retrograge series. I'm attracted by the whole "this is how it might have gone" thing.

I also enjoy the what-ifs. Like you said, it's the out-and-out AUs that have no connection to canon except for the characters' names that make me cringe. There have been a few that are amusing, even interesting like those AUs that really remove the characters while keeping them who they are. But most are just cheap, name-stealing original fics that make me wonder "why even label in fanfic?"

[karri-kln1671.livejournal.com]

*pats you* You're the spittin' image (so to speak) of my big sister, 'cept in disguise.

[kriadydragon.livejournal.com]

I am firm believer in the non-related-in-anyway-except for-looks-and/or-personality twins. I believe I have found five of mine, mostly in yearbooks.

[padawan-aneiki.livejournal.com]

Hee. Well my take is that one should be true to the characters as well, especially. But it seems to me that the whole point of writing in a fandom is to play in the sandbox that's been created, so it should be believable with what's been presented in canon.

Not to say I haven't seen some good AU's. There are a *few*. But generally where my strengths lie are in characterization anyway, getting into their heads and crawling around so...the more I can make it sound like canon, look like canon, and smell like canon, the better, IMO.

After all, that's what drew us to the fandom in the first place!

[kriadydragon.livejournal.com]

After all, that's what drew us to the fandom in the first place!

Exactly. It's why I like reading books based on shows, because it's an extension of that show giving us extra adventures. I became interested in fanfiction hoping to find more of the same, as well as contribute.

I'm not saying that people should only write canon fics (I may be uncomfortable with some AUs, but AUs are enjoyable). But, sometimes, I think writers get so caught up in genres or "creative character interpretations" that close-to-canon fics become somewhat of a rarity - depending on the fandom, of course.

[wildcat88.livejournal.com]

No need to explain, and I'm right there with you. I'm very canon oriented and don't see the appeal of the characters being something else.

[kriadydragon.livejournal.com]

Though I had a discussion concerning slash, I still don't see the appeal of trying to make a character bi-sexual, a transvestite... a woman when they're supposed to be a guy. Basically, everything they're obviously not on the show. Some people have a purpose for such out-there AUs, while other stories just make you wonder about them.